So you’ve hooked up with a girl online and now you don’t know how to gain her trust and take her home. Well, if you really like this girl, it’s important to know that it isn’t easy to gain.
It’s even worse if you lose it, as it’s even harder to get it back. Now, if you’re really into this girl, you’ll need her full trust as it’s essential in your relationship with her.
No matter if it’s just a regular hookup or you want something more, people are simply more relaxed and opened if they feel at ease with their partners.
If you care about a certain girl, you need to work on qualities like confidence, reliability, sincerity, and honesty. If you have any experience with hookups and casual sex, you know that these qualities matter a lot.
Since trust can’t be created, it can only be earned, it’s how you behave that truly matters here. We’ll go through some excellent tips on how to gain a girl’s trust to take her home and what you should and shouldn’t do to make sure that everything goes over smoothly.
Gaining Trust
If you want to gain a girl’s trust, think about yourself. Think about what you would do to gain it back if you let someone you care about down.
First of all, don’t assume anything, especially not that girls need some kind of special treatment, as you can fall into the territory of unfair generalization and stereotyping. Instead, follow some of the most basic trust-earning requirements:
- Be reliable
- Be honest
- Be open
- Show integrity
- Show respect
Learn From Previous Experiences
Most girls have been let down before, so there’s that too. If her trust was betrayed by someone close to her, she will probably be hesitant about visiting your place.
She fears being hurt again and you need to respect that. In fact, if you show that you care for her previous experiences, chances are that you’ll get what you want.
Regardless of whether this is just another casual hookup or a one night stand or a full-time relationship, things work almost the same. She won’t go with you if she doesn’t trust you, especially if she doesn’t know you well.
If she’s a bit hesitant to take an invitation to your place, don’t take it personally. Instead, do everything you can to make her feel good. Listen to her, including her previous disappointments, and learn from that experience. After all, it’s your actions and words that matter the most in the end.
State Your Intentions Clearly
Most trust issues with girls come from guys not being clear with their intentions. If you’re unequivocal and clear about what you want, it’ll be easier for her to trust you, because she knows exactly what you want.
Deception or evasiveness about your true intentions will only push her away. So, feel free to be upfront and tell her what you want, especially if you’re looking for a casual fling.
Having casual sex is about two people getting together for the sake of mutual pleasure so both sides know what’s happening. It’s a bit different when it comes to relationships, as it’s a situation where two people could be having two different views of what they really want.
Be honest from the start and you’ll earn her trust for sure.
Always Stay True to Yourself
Girls simply hate it when guys pretend to be something they’re not. Be yourself if you want to gain her trust. She already knows some of the details about you, so don’t try to fool her by fabricating an image that isn’t true to yourself. Be confident about yourself if you want to win her over, as girls love confident guys.
If you want to make her feel comfortable, you need to feel comfortable in your own skin, which means that you need to act, talk, and look like that. You have to be trustworthy if you want her to trust you.
Keep Your Promises
If you make a promise, follow it through. She needs to know that you’re reliable, this is very important for gaining trust.
If you say that you’ll do something, just do it, keep your word and prove to her that you’re worthy of her trust. Consistency is everything here, so make sure that you don’t let her down. Never make promises that you can’t keep.
Be Affectionate
If you’re on a date with a hookup, that doesn’t mean that you don’t have to be affectionate. On the contrary, it’s best to be affectionate but do it in an appropriate manner.
Girls know to appreciate small signs of affection like a gentle kiss or an unsolicited hug. If you can prove that you fully understand her needs and wants, you’ll gain her trust without any doubt. Be respectful though.
If she tells you that she’s still not ready to get physical, don’t push it, respect her limits and be mindful of her feelings. That’s a certain way to gain her trust. Pressuring her to do something she isn’t sure about isn’t going to get you anywhere.
Communication Is Everything
Honest, open and regular communication is one of the best ways to gain a girl’s trust. Prove yourself to be an interested, involved, and active listener and speak about your feelings truthfully and thoughtfully.
Make sure she knows that you acknowledge everything she tells you to demonstrate your focus on her needs.
Now that we showed you how to make the first steps towards gaining her trust, it’s time to go deeper down the rabbit hole and point out some of the dos and don’ts you need to consider. Studies show that men are more likely to accept casual sex, often from a stranger, while women would almost never accept.
That doesn’t mean women don’t want casual sex as much as men, instead, they may have more risks in casual sex compared to men. On the other hand, men tend to think that one night stands mean that they don’t need to put in any effort.
This is wrong. Girls love it when guys treat them with pride, dignity, and respect, especially if it’s a casual hookup thing. So here’s what to do to get her home for sure.
1. Surprise a Girl You Like
Think about how you can surprise her to make her feel welcome and relaxed. It doesn’t have to be anything expensive, it’s the gesture that counts.
Usually, flowers or some candy will do just fine and this is also an excellent way to start a conversation. You’ve talked online so you can already assume what she likes, so think about it. Showing that you care even in the slightest manner is always a good thing.
Don’t ignore her and then expect her to go home with you just because you’re on a hookup date. That simply won’t work. Remember, you’re both there for the same reason. If you can’t make it to a date, take your time to explain yourself and just set another date.
2. Show Her Your Undivided Attention
Girls love a guy who listens to them. She will open up eventually and that’s your moment to show that you care and that you want to comfort her. Make her laugh by sharing a similar experience, use your imagination and be creative.
Women are more insecure on hookups than men, so pay attention to her and show her that you care. If she feels like she can tell you anything, you will earn her trust and take her home.
Don’t give her high hopes if you’re not planning on making it worthwhile. We already mentioned how keeping promises matters here, so make sure that you are always straight with her.
3. Take Your Time with Her
Just because you’re having a hookup date doesn’t mean that you can just rush things. Take your time and plan everything upfront. If she can see your effort, it will be easier for her to trust you. If she insists on using a particular condom, be considerate about it.
On the other hand, if you’re not comfortable with what she asks, just tell her so. Don’t ever go beyond your limits and don’t hesitate to refuse anything that you may not like. You’re both here to enjoy yourselves so make sure that you do for real.
4. Keep It Casual
Casual sex and online dating are all about keeping things pleasurable, uncomplicated and safe. That means that most people prefer it to be all fun with no commitments, no drama, and no strings attached.
If you’re not sure about your intentions or if you feel that she might be up for something more than that, be honest with her.
Don’t rush into anything but most importantly, make sure that your date knows what’s going on. Don’t lie to her to get what you want.
If you’re honest about your intentions, even when they’re completely different than hers, there are still great chances that you’ll get what you want in the end just for being honest.
5. Lust Is a Normal Thing
It’s only natural that you feel lust if a girl you’re dating is as hot as hell. There’s nothing wrong with wanting her. After all, that’s why you’re dating her in the first place. Most of the time, casual hookups are all about lust and desire.
Still, that doesn’t mean that you should jump all over her the moment you see her. Lust is a normal thing and it’s recommended that you give her a few hints about how you feel about her.
Don’t rush things and don’t pressure your date. Being in a hurry isn’t going to do you any favors when you want to take a girl home. In fact, pressuring your date is only going to make her feel awkward.
Instead, state what you want step by step and make sure she fully understands what you’re up to. Always be a gentleman before anything else.
6. Make It Interesting
If things are moving in the right direction, it’s time to spice things up and make it interesting. Since online dating for the sake of casual sex is all about trying something kinky and new without being emotionally obsessed or judged for it, share your fantasies with your partner. You shouldn’t be afraid to make things a bit wild but don’t exaggerate.
Ask her to tell you the wildest thing she’s done so far, as this can really boost her confidence to share her deepest desires with you, which is a certain way to gain her trust. Who knows, maybe you both love the same things or you’re ready to try something new.
Remember, you’re here to have some fun and enjoy each other. For that reason, don’t insist on doing things to her that she doesn’t like because that won’t get you anywhere.
Respect her wishes, give her some freedom to say what she likes and pay attention to what she’s saying. If you do, your chances of taking her home will suddenly improve.
Aside from all the things we’ve mentioned, it’s also good to keep in mind the biggest two don’ts when it comes to casual sex.
Don’t get involved with people you’re good friends with just for the sake of having sex, as these things almost never end in a nice way.
While having friends with benefits has certain advantages, things can get pretty complicated if you’re playing this game with people you’ve known for a very long time.
Finally, don’t seek casual hookups if you’re in a relationship, as you’ll do more damage than good.
While it might sound like fun, it can turn into a complete disaster and cause you to lose a person you love. This might have devastating consequences for both of you, so you should know better.
If your partner is into kinky games and would love a threesome with a stranger, well then, that’s a completely different story that we’ll leave for some other, more convenient situation.
