Finding a good hookup is not that easy sometimes. Traditionally, it takes a lot of time and effort, it usually involves a lot of rejection, frustration, and uncertainty. And if you’re going through a dry spell, it can be maddening trying to find the right person to get naughty with.
Technology has changed the game, though. We’ve got the whole world at the tips of our fingers, and dating apps have made our potential partners more accessible than ever. Whether you’re looking for a hookup, date, or romance, there’s an app for that.
You might be wondering why you should download a dating app when you could just meet people in real life. You might not be sure about the differences between online dating and traditional dating. Well, take a look.
Simplicity
How many times have you struggled to find the right words to say to your date? How can you really tell someone, to their face, that you just want to hook up with them and nothing more? Or on the contrary, that you’re looking for something serious and don’t really want to mess around anymore?
It’s not that easy being so upfront about what you want. You never know what the other person is thinking, what their expectations are, and none of us want to feel embarrassed after saying what’s truly on our minds.
When it comes to traditional dating, you have to find the courage to say what you want, and it’s a leap of faith. Do they feel the same way? Is she going to throw that drink in my face? Is he going to tell others what I’ve said?
Online apps make this so much simpler. If you’re looking for a hookup, you just put that in your bio. You don’t have to feel ashamed or guilty. If others ain’t buying what you’re selling, they’ll just swipe left and go on their merry way.
And once you start chatting with your match, they already know what you’re up for. You can let them know exactly what you want to do and where. It takes little to no effort to find a good match for yourself on dating apps, no matter what kind of match you’re searching for.
The Search
Now, this one might be obvious, but let’s dig a little deeper into it. Before the dating apps, what did you have to do to meet your potential partners? Well, you had to go out, socialize, get embarrassed on a blind date that your friend had set up. Listen to your grandma while she tells you about all the handsome grandchildren that her friend Gertrude has.
In an effort to meet someone new, frequenting bars and clubs was a go-to option, and striking up a conversation with a stranger can be awkward to say the least. Your success rate probably wasn’t the best, and you had to laugh it off in front of your friends even though your ego suffered a blow.
Now don’t get us wrong, this is actually a good thing! You get to develop your social skills, even through rejection. I mean, who’s going to be better at meeting new people? A person who’d been rejected just a couple of times, or a person who’d been rejected 500 times?
Even if you rely on online dating, you still have to meet those people in real life, and you want to stay on top of your game. The only way to do this is to go out and get experience.
But honestly, when it comes to the search, it’s easier to find a good match online. While some say that it’s impersonal just swiping left and right from your couch in front of the TV, it’s not as superficial as that.
You can browse their profiles and see if you have similar interests and hobbies. You can immediately learn if they’re just like you, and are searching for a casual hookup without commitments.
The Whole Wide World
Traditional dating is fun and exciting, you have that addicting feeling in your stomach when you feel the spark and the instant attraction when you meet a new person. Unfortunately though, our lives sometimes don’t leave enough time for us to go out and meet new potential partners.
Sometimes your job or school, or even your social circle, doesn’t really allow you to regularly meet new people. That’s mostly the reason why people turn to dating sites.
The internet gives you many more opportunities to meet interesting people. And you don’t have to focus on your immediate area. Especially if you’re looking for a hookup, searching outside of your town might be the most comfortable option for you.
Online apps open a whole new world where you can meet potential partners, and you are much more likely to find someone who shares your interests.
The best thing about them is that it doesn’t really matter where you’re from. You can find dates from all over the country, and with some international dating sites all over the world.
So next time you’re feeling horny on your business trip or during your vacation, you can meet the right person to relieve your tension in a matter of minutes.
You can even play a fun game if you’re into casual sex with different people. Set a goal for yourself to sleep with at least one person from every continent. If you’re feeling extra adventurous, you can even make that with one person from every country.
Choices, choices, choices…
Honestly, the reality of the situation is that people are superficial. While sexiness is a relative term, we all have our “type”. Some like short girls, others short guys. Some like the tall, dark, and handsome type, others prefer blonds. Athletic, chubby, blue eyes, long hair, we all have some physical qualities that we’d prefer if our partner had.
In the real world, at your local bar or club, you don’t really have as many options as you’d think.
Sometimes you have to lower your standards, sometimes it’s just not your night and you have to go home defeated. And it can be frustrating putting on a smile and coming up with a new pickup line for every person there. There’s just so many times you can do that in person.
With dating apps on the other hand, you can be as picky as you’d like. You can match with someone based completely on their physical appearance, or you can match with them based on their interests and career goals.
When you choose to send them an awesome pickup line, you’re doing so based on all the information that’s available about them, and it makes for a smoother conversation with fewer pitfalls.
And even if you blow it with the pickup line, you can always go to the next match and try again. Someone’s bound to find you interesting in that huge pool of available guys and girls.
Efficiency
First things first, it’s damn expensive meeting people in the real world. I’d say it’s even more so for the guys. The easiest way to start a conversation at the bar is to offer someone a drink, and honestly, when was the last time a girl decided to do that?
So, you’re a single guy on a Friday night, you keep buying drink after drink for the ladies there, only to get rejected for the 100th time. You go home without a single correct phone number and an empty wallet.
You’ve wasted your money, your time, your energy. The whole night’s left you feeling discouraged.
That doesn’t really happen with online apps. Online dating can be life-changing, and it’s very efficient. You could be sitting at home feeling bored while you binge-watch another series on Netflix and decide you’d like to have some fun instead.
There’s no need to spend money on drinks and food for you, for the date, or anything. You could just hit a hottie up, agree on the time and place, and have a blast.
Time-efficiency is another plus for online dating. It’s early evening when you decide you’d like some company. You have to get ready, go out, spend time flirting with various people until you find a willing partner. If you have a meeting the next morning, you don’t want to be staying out late trying to hook up with someone.
If you’d like to meet up for some casual sex within the next hour, you could just tell the app and start swiping. When you find a match, you both already know what you’re looking for, so you can just agree to meet up right away, and you’ll be back home feeling great in no time.
Misrepresentation
It’s basically in our nature to lie when we meet someone new. Be it online or in the real world, we always want to seem better than we really are.
When it comes to the traditional, real world dating, you really have to be a deception artist to get away with some of the common lies. So, when you date traditionally, you usually know who you’re dealing with. They cannot really lie about their physical appearance, and can’t truly hide their character traits so well.
You have a chance to ask around about that person. Talk with some shared friends and acquaintances. Your date can basically be pre-vetted, so you kind of know what you’re getting yourself into.
Misrepresentation in online dating is much easier. People can use fake profile pictures, lie about who they are, what they’re into.
But you do get an extra layer of protection with online dating. You don’t have to meet up with your date physically until you’re completely comfortable.
If you wanted, you could spend some time just chatting with them, even if you’re just looking for a hookup. It’s always best to get to know your partner a bit before you jump into bed with them.
If you see any red flags, if they’re asking too many personal questions and are pushing you to meet them somewhere specific, your own common sense will tell you that’s not what you want to do. And when you’re chatting online, it’s much easier to get out of the situation than in the real world.
Snap Back to Reality
Traditional dating takes time, you usually get to know the person over a course of a few dates, you have to spend time together, learn about each other, and it’s a greater leap of faith.
It doesn’t matter if you’re looking for a hookup or a new boyfriend/girlfriend, you have to spend more time with that person, and that can lead to greater emotional involvement.
You can basically know immediately if there’s chemistry between the two of you, you get a gut feeling as soon as you meet.
But if you’re looking for something completely casual, and you find the chemistry too strong through the course of your conversation, it can lead you to develop the feelings you never wanted to. After all, there’s a reason why you’re looking for a hookup and not a romantic partner, isn’t there?
And with online dating, it takes time to figure out whether there’s any chemistry there or not. People can be witty and charming through text messages, but really awkward in real life. And it’s actually not until you meet in the real world that you find out if you have that spark.
If you notice you’re developing feelings for your casual sex partner, it can be easier to take a step back and stop communication as soon as you’d like. It would be kind of awkward if you did that on a real date.
With all this in mind, it might be obvious what the best choice for you personally would be. But the best thing you could do is not make a choice at all. You don’t have to rely only on traditional dating or only on online dating.
You can take the best of both worlds and, with that, increase your chances of finding the most suitable partner for you. After all, online dating is just opening the door for you to meet new people. You still have to go out into the real world to truly make a connection with them.
